Many of you know our adoption story. It’s a beautiful one and my favorite one at that!
It’s been two years since we’ve seen Harper’s’ birth mom. We’ve been in Florida vacationing and we were able to meet up with S and her parents. I am always anxious prior to our meetings…I don’t know why, they are always perfect. As a person who always wants everyone to be happy, I guess I feel sort of a guilt knowing that I am a woman who has caused grief to H’s birth family.
You see, it’s not easy to understand unless you’ve gone through the adoption process. The extreme emotions you feel when you are walking away from the hospital with your new baby and your baby’s birth mom is walking away empty handed is one that will never be able to adequately explain in words, but I’ll try.
You are on cloud nine because you have a baby but your heart is broken for the woman and family that just made the hardest decision in the world, one I don’t think I’d ever be strong enough to make myself. I often wonder if S ever regrets her decision.
I feel so incredibly blessed that we chose to have an open adoption. H will always know that her birth mom (and family) loved her so much that she made the heroic decision to choose another woman to be her daughter’s mommy. Every time we meet with them, I always laugh afterwards and wonder why I get so nervous beforehand. It’s always perfect and we always pick up right where we left off last. It is such a joy to watch our little girl thoroughly enjoy life and have a few hours to play next to her biological family. A family that is not just hers, but ours too.
Adoption is such a beautiful thing and we are a so blessed by it. S- thank you for making me a mommy. I love you!
Thanks to my parents, sister and brother in-law as well for coming along.